JOKES

David James
Scientists are baffled by Portsmouth and England goalkeeper, David James. He volunteered to ba a guinea pig in medical experiments but despite exposing himself to several highly infectiuos diseases, tests show he can't catch anything!

Wayne Rooney
Why did Wayne Rooney take soup to the England training session?
- He heard Fabio was going to give him a free roll!

Emile Heskey
Co-commentator: "I thought Heskey went down very easily after that challenge".
commentator: "Yes, he did seem to make Emile of it!"

Michael Owen
Michael Owen walks up to a girl and says "Hello darling, can I have a kiss?" The girl replies "Ooh I say, you're a little forward"

Sad supporter 1
As the fans pile out of the ground after a 0-0 bore draw, the PA announcer says "This is a message for Mr.Jeff Smith, your wife has just gone into hospital as she has just gone into labour" One fan turns to his mate and says "poor bloke, he's just had to sit through that rubbish and now he's got to go and make his own tea!"

Sad supporter 2
Two blokes stranded on a desert island, One turns to the other and says "my football team lost today" the other replies "how do you know?" the first bloke says " because it's Saturday!"

More jokes to be added soon

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